Turbulence

I am turbulent, says my Italian neighbor, whom you met in the last post.  

Again with my affection for non-native English speakers. Often contractions aren’t used, making comments sound more definitive, more formal. And often adjectives get picked that we native speakers wouldn’t have even thought of but that are perfect.

Turbulent.  And notice he didn’t say I am feeling turbulent.  He said I AM turbulent.

Me too, neighbor, me too. Ask Siri for synonyms for turbulent and she will give you:

Agitated, troubled, stormy, swirling, rough, choppy, bumpy, unstable.

Sounds about right.

Like everyone right now, I have my good days and my bad days.  Good days when I laugh at every funny meme someone sends me online, make lists of all the restaurants I can’t wait to go back to, start planning my next trip in my head…. and days when I get bored and restless and worried and, well, turbulent.  

Just like travel.  Not every flight is smooth.  Some are choppy and bumpy and turbulent, but we’ve been on so many that it doesn’t throw us, we just buckle up and know that we’ll land soon.  Have another glass of wine and daydream about our destination.

For what it’s worth, I learned a few things being in the financial industry during the crisis 12 years ago.  That was certainly not as broad based and as scary as what we’re going through now, but the lessons I learned are still relevant:

1.     Just do the next right thing.  (this idea is echoed, by the way, in a new book by my favorite author.  “Untamed” by Glennon Doyle.  Go read it, it is fabulous).  You can’t predict the future, so stop making yourself crazy trying to scenario plan.

2.     Maintain your self care rituals.  Keep working out and doing all of the things that you usually do to take care of yourself and feel your best.  Your first instinct will be to get rid of those things because they somehow feel wrong or indulgent or like a waste of time.  They are not.  Keep taking care of yourself.  We need you.

3.     Use this time to edit.  We have all been given a pattern interrupt here, so use it.  Business as usual has screeched to an abrupt stop.  Use this forced time out to make sure you are spending your time and resources in the most impactful places based on the results and values that are most important to you.

Our team hired a fabulous coach about a year ago, and she helped me put the above into words after a long conversation last week. Our relationship with her has made a world of difference in how we function and approach our responsibilities to our clients, our families, and ourselves, even before this current challenge was upon us. You can read more about her team at www.fruitionpersonalcoaching.com

Something else she brought to our attention that has been invaluable in our work in literally all areas of our lives, is an understanding of the 6 human needs. In no particular order:

1.     Significance

2.     Love and Connection

3.     Certainty

4.     Uncertainty (aka Variety)

5.     Growth

6.     Contribution

I’d argue everyone’s list pretty much just narrowed itself down to #2 and #3.   

Well, we can’t have #3.  If we ever even really had it.  We just thought we did.

So that leaves us with #2.  Much of our love and connection has been punted to cyberspace, so we do the best we can.  We wave to our neighbors, FaceTime with family, have Zoom happy hours with old friends (try this!  It’s so fun).

Spread as much love and give yourself as much connection as you can, friends.  

Do the next right thing.

Take extra good care of yourself.

Use this time to edit and refocus on what’s important to you.

Buckle up and know that we’ll land before too long.  Have another glass of wine and daydream about our destination.

See you there,

Traveling Girl

PS: my version of a PSA…. In a recent Terrific article in The Atlantic, this quote grabbed me: “”Think of it this way: There are now only two groups of Americans. Group A includes everyone involved in the medical response, whether that’s treating patients, running tests, or manufacturing supplies. Group B includes everyone else, and their job is to buy Group A more time.”

So one last thing. Let’s be as excellent a Group B as we possibly can. Everyone take care of yourselves. We’re all in this together.