The Art of Doing Nothing in Mexico

Good morning, friends, and Happy Easter, Passover, and April Fool’s Day. Seems like everything is happening at once this weekend.

And yet over here in my little room in Cabo, drinking coffee in bed and writing, absolutely nothing is happening.

I wrote to some friends this morning that I had nothing to put on my blog because all I’ve done on this trip is sit in the sun and read. So my accomplishments thus far include getting sunburned and finishing two books. No adventures, no sights seen, no Sting encounters.

Which is the point, isn’t it? We need time like this, be it at home, on a beach, in a cabin in the mountains…. time to just let the nervous system unspool a little. And the longer you wait, the harder it is to do….your mind is filled with shoulds….I should go for a run before breakfast….I really should check email one more time…..maybe call the office.

And I’m here by myself. When we’re with others, we create more shoulds for them as well….he really should put on more sunscreen…. should she really fall asleep like that in the sun? And on. And on. What’s the point of having time to relax if you spend the whole time thinking you and everyone else should be doing things that are not, in fact, relaxing?

Don’t look at me like that. You know I’m right. We all do it.

This next part will seem like a non-sequitur, but stick with me for a minute, it ties back in:

In case you thought I actually hadn’t been anywhere since December…

I haven’t written about my experience in February at the Hoffman Process, a week-long personal development retreat in California, primarily because it defies written explanation. It was painful and joyful and excruciating and enlightening and maybe the most important thing I’ve ever done. I’ve started and then deleted several posts about it.

What I can explain, though, I’ve discovered this morning, is how my perspective has changed. How I’ve been able to let go of things that don’t serve me (and probably drive other people nuts too).

Among other things, the shoulds are softer. They’re a whisper compared to the loud, insistent, needling creatures they used to be. They’re followed by question marks. Should I run before breakfast? Nah. I ran yesterday. I’ll give that sore hamstring a break. More time to read. (As you may have gathered, dear readers, I’m not the most relaxed person you know, so learning how to relax was huge for me, and I suspect a challenge for most over-scheduled, over-worked Americans. We’re hard on everybody else because we’re hard on ourselves.)

I’m curious about, rather than judgmental of, the people around me….I wonder what their stories are. Even the loud guy at the pool yesterday, who two months ago might have gotten under my skin so badly I would have left and found someplace else to sit. Not much annoys me. It took me a day to downshift into this vacation and actually chill out, but hey, it used to take me three days on a trip like this. Three days just to unwind and quit looking at my damn phone every ten minutes. And then it would be time to go home. Sound familiar?

I’m grateful to have these few days of reading, writing, and soaking up sunshine. Extra grateful that I get to do it in such a gorgeous locale. I’m a lucky girl.

And there’s nothing I should be doing.

What can you let go of that isn’t serving you? Wishing you a day full of relaxation, connection with those you love, and free of shoulds.

Cheers!

Traveling Girl